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Quotable Quotes
Here are some quotes that I loooove saying! Woot.

"I used to have a handle on life, but it broke."

"Don't take life too seriously; no one gets out alive."

"You're just jealoud because the vioces only talk to me."

"Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder."

"Earth is the insane asylum for the universe."

"I'm not a complete idiot -- some parts are missing."

"Out of my mind. Back in five minutes."

"It's called thinking ... you should try it sometime."

"NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I hurt your feelings? Let me call an ambulance."

"I don't need your attitude, I've got one of my own."

"God must love stupid people; He made so many."

"The gene pool could use a little chlorine."

"Conciousness: that annoying time between naps."

"Ever stop to think ... a forget to start again?"

"Being "over the hill" is much better than being under it!"

"Wrinkled is not one of the things I wanted to be when I grew up."

"Procrastinate now!"

"I have a degree in Liberal Arts; do you want fries with that?"

"A hangover is the wrath of grapes."

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance."

"Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!"

"They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken."

"He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead."

"A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory."

"Ham and eggs. A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig."

"The trouble with life is there's no background music."

"The original click and point was a Smith and Wesson."

"I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on."

"Don't pee in the wind." - Me.

"He who lives in a glass house should not throw rocks. That's where I screwed up, you see." - Me.

"He who laughs last, thinks the slowest? ... haha, that's a good one." - Me.

"Don't take a dump in a stump." - Me.

"We've been together for 15 years. In a marriage, that's an achievement. That's with 2 people. We've got 3." - Tré Cool

"Someone walked up to me on the street and asked: "What's punk?" I kicked over a garbage can and said "That's punk." They kicked over another one and asked: "That's punk?" "No," I replied. "That's trendy."

"So that's the CN tower, eh? I've got a bigger tower in my pants."

"Smell my hand."

"I have a message for all the kids out there: I never finished high school, and I'm very rich and very successful."

"Attack your instruments. Don't let them attack you."

"They always say "ain't that a bitch?". Thats why the call them the obitchuaries."

"There's nothing wrong with being a loser. It just depends on how good you are at it."

"Do you have a problem? I have a gun. I'll shoot you. No problem.

"Do I want to change the world? To a certain extent, yeah. It needs to be changed ... it needs a kick up the ass."

"Never run in the rain with your socks on."

"Green Day is like sex. When we're good, we're really good! When we're bad ... we're still pretty damn good!"
As you can see, it's still a work in progress. I'm still working on some more, and I'll post them when I do.